From a spiritual perspective, this constant seeking – or as the Vipassana Buddhists refer to as the endless cycle of ‘craving/aversion’ is what keeps us from being truly free. I try to practice ‘aparigraha’ as often as I can. I’m not very good at it, but even when I find myself grasping terribly, it gives me an opportunity to see myself more clearly and to see where there is work that needs to be done.
The other morning I had an interesting occurrence that triggered a powerful surge of craving, aversion and beyond. My cat had just spent three days terribly ill, with many hours spent at the vet and the animal emergency hospital. Those of you who are pet lovers probably know that you can easily rack up hundreds, even thousands of dollars in trying to maintain the health of your pet.
While I was already in the throws of grasping at keeping Zane alive, I was also feeling the financial strain of his hospital bills. As I was driving the studio, listening to the radio, the dj announced a contest: Call in and if they pull your birth month from a hat, you win $1000. If they then pull your actual birthdate, you win $10 000. I have never called in to a radio show, but somehow felt like today was my lucky day. The line was free and it rang! My heart started thumping as I imagined what I would do with my winnings. Suddenly, I heard the dj greet someone on to the show. It wasn’t me..so I hung up. I listened. After exchanging pleasantries, they pulled the month. April, My birth month. I instantly felt robbed of $1000! Next they pulled the date: the 20th. My jaw dropped. That is my birthday! I had just missed out on $10 000! It was fascinating for me to witness my reaction to this,
My nervous system went haywire and feelings of incredulousness and injustice washed over me. I marvelled at how it felt so real that I had just ‘lost’ something that essentially was never mine and never even existed! I was the same person I was a few minutes earlier only now I somehow felt like I had less! Nothing is really ours. We certainly don’t get to take any of our possessions with us to the grave! All we have is this moment and our breath. We are all abundant. We are all whole. Possessions come and go but they do not add or subtract from our essence, our inherent completeness.
I relayed this story to my Mom and she, ever the optimist, exclaimed delightedly ‘Do you know what this means?! This means you are this close to incredible luck and fortune! It’s just around the corner!’. And when I look within, it is in fact, already here.
Katie McClelland, Owner, Director-De La Sol Yoga
(905)540-3569 • 430 York Blvd • Katiesolyoga@gmail.com
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