We are not born unhappy or fearful, but if we’re not careful the sheer weight of living may end up turning us into miserable ogres. Here are a few pointers we may learn from our younger happier selves:
1. Sharing
is caring: Remember when mom, or the teacher would repeat tell you that?
Well, it’s true. We’re not talking crayons anymore, though. Share your
life lessons, pay it forward, and listen, really listen to others. Make someone
else happy, too. You’ll be surprised at the level of joy that may bring into
your life.
2. Be
forgetful: Children are so resilient, precisely because they have a short
memory. If you let it, life may provide endless reasons to be miserable.
Your actions may not lead to the desired results, people may not live up to
your expectations. No matter what, remember the lesson, discard the negative
emotion, and move forward.
3. Say
Please and Thank You: Another childhood mantra. This may work in a couple
of ways: Treat people with the kindness and respect you would like to be
treated, but also take stalk of your life. Be thankful for the good things, and
take any challenge or difficulty as an opportunity for growth.
4. Be Deaf
to Negatives. We’ve all been there as children staring at the raised index
finger of an adult telling us “don’t do that!!" while we mischievously
plot our next move. More likely than not, we have since internalized that exact
phrase, which comes out of our mouths as "I can’t" or “I
shouldn’t." Well, snap out of it; stop asking for permission, and
focus your energy on achieving and just being.
5. Laugh
Hard and Often: Adults are forever devising games to elicit a smile or a
giggle from a child, and as kids we find it easy to laugh. It’s so sad
that we often think of adulthood as the serious phase of our lives. I beg to
differ. Humor is the salt that seasons an otherwise insipid life. Besides,
a little ironic distance has never hurt anybody.
6. Hug Often
and with Vigour: Here’s another expression of joy that is taken away from
us when we reach adulthood. I’m not saying you should initiate
inappropriate behaviour in the workplace. Perhaps, hugging the mail man may be
a bit too much, but hug the people you love. Take advantages of naturally
occurring wonder-neurotransmitters. Read up on oxytocin, if you dont believe
me.
7. Be Good
to Yourself: As children we’re all about hedonism we do, eat, and say what
we want when we want it, but by the time we’re all grown up we’ve turned into stoics. What’s up with that?
All I’m saying is schedule that weekly visits to the Spa, take regular
naps, don’t lose the love of idle play. Meditate, practice yoga, take a
walk in the park or a nice luxurious lavender bath, give your body and
mind a chance to slow down.
8. Have a
ME-Moment: I’m not suggesting we should all be that annoying selfish brat
we hated even as kids, but rather have the reverence for the hard work you put
in. Celebrate it by doing something you love every day.It can be something
as simple as cooking yourself a fantastic dinner (or going out for one), or
setting aside an hour to work on your memoir, learn a new language or practice
your guitar.
9. Stop the
Compulsive Thoughts: Children live in the moment, they don’t have enough
past to be obsessed by it, and the future (the way we conceive of it in our
adult minds) is pure science fiction. All that counts is the present. There is
a lesson to be learned: When it comes to thinking, less is more. Too much
of it, and we run the risk of crossing over into neurosis.
10. When
Everything Else Fails, Chocolate: I’m not joking
(ok, I am just a little). Have a reserve of fine quality chocolate in
your fridge (I’d advise on Belgian or Swiss. Nutella also
works, but not as well). Nothing like feeding your inner child every so often.
Plus it’s scientifically proven chocolate makes you
happy. Skeptic again? Read up on phenylethylamine and cannabinoids
in chocolate.
About the Author
Rita
Gagliano is a Certified Coach Practitioner at Lavandula Wellness Center. You
can follow her blog at http://www.thrivedynamics.ca, or book an appointment at
http://www.lavandulawellnesscentre.com/.
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